March 15, 2023 PM Post

       I rang the bell!  The radiation treatments are finished and I got to ring the bell that hangs on the wall in the radiation waiting room. Everyone in the waiting room clapped, the guy at the “desk” whom I had seen several times stood and clapped, and they gave me a hope pin and took my picture.
       In the six times that I was in that waiting room, I never heard the bell ring for someone else.  I was looking forward to experiencing that.  Hopefully, the clang of the bell this morning brought some hope to someone that they can get through their treatments.
       When I met with the radiation oncologist after the second treatment, I asked when they would have some clue whether the treatments and hormone therapy were working.  Would they do some blood work to check the levels of my PSA or hormone?
       He said, “No. We will have you back here in about six months and we will do some testing then.”  Seeing that there must have been a concerned look on my face, he said, “We have very, very good results with the treatments you are getting.  We are confident that they will take care of your prostate cancer.”
       Other than dealing with the next 5-6 months of having extremely low hormones, I believe with the doctor that this cancer will be in the past.  It’s never 100%, but little in life is.
       I am backwards of most people when it comes to medical treatment.  I read very little until the treatment is over.  I know that comes with some risks.  It was some time after the cancer surgery on my leg before I read the reports.  Knowing going in that it was a stage four might have been more than I could have handled.
       When I got back to the room about noon after the treatment, I decided it was time to know something more about the treatment than I knew.
       It’s called Proton Beam Therapy and there are only about 40 centers across the US that have this machine.  To my knowledge, there is none in Kentucky.  The closest to us is the Cincinnati Children’s Hospital.  That makes a lot of sense because the “beam therapy” is considered the best for children with cancer because it damages little of the surrounding tissue, if any.
       Looking back on the boy who was completing his treatment and brought in the cookies after having 30 radiation treatments, it made a lot of sense why he was receiving the proton therapy.
       It also makes sense now as I look back on the treatments when I would hear the tech or the doctor say, “We have the beam.”  That meant that the proton machine had rotated to the treatment room that I was in.  I will long remember “We have the beam.”  I wish I could make some profound connection.  Maybe in time.
       I have sat here this afternoon thinking about what I know now that I didn’t know some weeks ago when I was diagnosed with multiple myeloma.  It was the diagnosis of the second cancer that prompted us to contact Mayo Clinic and seek to return here.
       Had the second cancer not been detected when it was, I would have had the usual treatment for prostate cancer, having no clue that there was a proton therapy that appears thus far to be a much easier treatment than I would have faced.
       Did God have anything to do with me getting to Mayo when we did?  My childlike faith would say, “without question He had some input.”
       I realize that opens a lot of questions, most of which I have few answers.  Here is what I do know.  Our God is a God of grace.  It is only by God’s grace that I was privileged to return to Mayo Clinic and have both cancers treated.
       It had nothing to do with who I am, but everything to do with who God is.  That is the nature of grace.  We can’t earn it in any way, but we can receive His grace.  I am a recipient of His grace and give Him thanksgiving for His gift of grace to me.  And that grace covers far more than any medical treatment that I am privileged to receive.
       All of the blessings of my life (and yours) are because of God’s grace in my life.  None of them I deserve.  They come from His loving hand.
       It would appear to me that as I continue to try to figure out this theory of calories in ice cream being worth it, that one final piece of data would help later today.  It would seem reasonable to me that if the calories appear to be worth it when it has been a tough day and you need a lift, then it is highly likely that they could be deemed worth it when a celebration calls for rejoicing.